Perfect title.
After a struggling rock band's (I use "rock" loosly since the music this band makes is that modern new rock that is made for pussies and homos) manger leaves them, the female of the band decides to not stay with her bandmates but chooses to stay the night with a stranger. Well, this stranger turns out to be a rock n roll vampire! Before you can say "cool style man" the entire band has been transformed into a new cool rock band that can float while playing. They just have a problem with killing a few people along the way to their next gig.
Yeah, the film is as bad as it sounds. Why did I bother? There are numerous cameos by actually good musicians such as Iggy Pop, Henry Rollins and one of my personal favorites Alice Cooper. Even Malcolm McDowell has a smaller role as Eddie Van Helsing, a vampire killer who has his own personal vendetta with the vampires. None of these celebrities is worth sitting through this 90 minute horror/comedy. This is just painful to watch.
The "comedy" is down right bad and cheesy. Nothing is funny and I can almost hear the non existent laugh track pause when certain characters speak. The main vampire looks like a black haired Carrot Top and he occasionally busts into a few songs out of nowhere, when he's not walking in slow motion of course. I guess they were trying to pad out the running time. I would have shut this off or fast forward the film if it wasn't for this blog. I will admit, I couldn't take the musical numbers after awhile and slammed my finger on that FF button every time music started to kick in. One thing I hate is a bad horror film. But what I hate even more are horror/comedy/musicals. Adding those three genres together is like adding mustard to your steak.
Chalk it up to just another shitty vampire film. I need to watch Martin or Near Dark to remember a time when vampire movies were decent.
Man of a Thousand Faces
The great Lon Chaney from London After Midnight
